Top 10 Reasons to Leave Your Wife
If you’re contemplating an affair or simply leaving your wife, there are innumerable reasons why you should go through with the decision. Since I have some experience in this area, I’d be happy to share a few of my thoughts in the form of the top 10 reasons to go for it.
Perhaps you’re feeling bored with your marriage…more like roommates than anything else. Or, maybe you’re experiencing so much conflict with her that you just can’t take it anymore. Or, you may not be attracted anymore to the woman you originally pledged your love to (i.e., your wife), and you’ve found some hot chick at work…or church.
Whatever the situation may be, you’ve probably been searching for “good reasons” to go ahead and make a move. You know all the reasons NOT to do it, but you’re probably hoping that there is another perspective that would align with the longings of your heart. Well, you’ve come to the right place. All those men’s magazines tell you how to get laid, but I want to help you understand why to have the affair.
You may not actually want to physically “leave” your wife…maybe you just want to have a little fun on the side. Statistics show that if you cheat (and get caught), you’ll eventually leave her…or she’ll leave you. One or the other usually happens. Well, let’s cut to the chase!
If you leave your wife, you can expect to…
10. Enjoy plenty of time and space to do your own thing.
All those “honey do” lists will be long gone. There will only be one thing she’ll want you to do…move out. Unfortunately, you’ll need to have a brief conversation about finances and how that will all work. She’ll probably get really angry with you, but it will be worth it. You will soon be shopping for your own apartment, and you can choose whatever you want. At first, you’ll get excited about that killer bachelor pad in the cool part of town (by the beach if you live near one), but you’ll probably settle for the most affordable option…a studio apartment or a one-bedroom unit near your family’s home (where you used to live). You’ll pull together whatever furniture you can find, and your schedule will be completely freed up. That is, once you shop for all the things you took for granted at your former home…pots, pans, towels, sheets, toilet paper, soap…you get the point. Have fun with all that new-found time and space!
9. Watch any movie you want and play video games 24/7.
You know all those violent action movies or pay-per-view pornos…feel free to watch them now. No one will be complaining or watching over your shoulder. On top of that, you’ll need to buy a new video game system for the kids when they come over. And, the great thing about it is…you’ll get to play it 24/7 when they’re not around. Your wife won’t be around to want your attention anymore. You’ll be able to turn off all the lights, crank up the sound, and kill everything in sight!
8. Eat anything and everything.
You know how your wife used to keep the fridge and cabinets stocked with all sorts of food? You get to do that now. (By the way, did you buy a refrigerator yet? You’ll probably need one of those.) Fill it with as much meat as you want…or microwave meals. Those things are way easier to fix than anything else, and there’s not a single thing to wash…as long as you use a plastic fork as well. Those are quite handy! If you don’t feel like eating, you won’t need to. And, if you just want to eat a bunch of crap all the time, go right ahead…hit that drive-thru every day on the way to and from work. By the way, be prepared to buy some bigger pants!
7. Work out as much or little as you’d like.
Since you’ll have so much time on your hands, working out may become a nightly activity for yourself. In the past, you may not have had enough time with some of your family duties, but now you’ll have more time than you know what to do with. You’ll probably want to lose those 10-100 pounds you’ve been packing on during the comfy years of marriage, because the hottie you’re having an affair with won’t be that impressed. If you’re not already having an affair, you’ll definitely want to lose the weight in preparation to find a new and improved woman. Jump on that treadmill, and start sweatin’ off the pounds!
6. Spend only a few hours a week with the kids.
I know you love your kids, but let’s just admit that they can be a pain in the butt. They’re completely self-centered. They want everything in sight. And, on top of that, they whine and cry. Another great thing about leaving your wife is that the kids will stay with her. You’ll have another one of those brief, painful conversations about when, where, and how you’ll spend time with the little rugrats. In the beginning, you’ll be bummed that you don’t get to see them all the time, but you’ll get over it. Every time you see them, you’ll do whatever it takes to make them happy. You’ll buy them toys, games, and fun stuff to eat. And, you can take them to places that their mother can’t afford to take them to…amusement parks, out to dinner, and any movie they want to see. Once they go home, you won’t have to worry about baths, homework, or bedtime craziness. Of course, you’ll miss out on the before-bed routines…answering precious questions, praying with them, and snuggling in bed. But, that’s okay, you won’t have to put up with all the tough stuff either!
5. Experience the golden silence of no nagging wife or screaming children.
Once the kids are back at the house where you used to live, you’ll have your apartment all to yourself. Total and complete silence…no more nagging wife telling you to pick up your underwear or wash your dishes or quit farting during dinner. No more screaming and whining from the kids when you ask them to do their homework, clean their room, or brush their teeth before bed. How does that silence sound to your ears? Golden? Yeah, now you can replace it with more soothing noises…music, movies, video games, and the crunching of chips as you eat them all alone in peace. You’ll start to hear the clock tick, the fan in your computer spin, and the footsteps of your neighbors as they approach their door. You’ll hear everything…even the voices within. How does all that sound?
4. Choose whether or not you even want to go to church.
You know how your wife asked you about all that spiritual stuff? Maybe even going to church? Now, you won’t have to deal with any of that nonsense. Let her chat about all that touchy-feely crap with all her girlfriends. Be a man, and be strong! All that Christian crap is for people who just need a crutch to deal with life. I’m sure you won’t need any of that. It doesn’t work anyway, right? Just pop open a beer, and plop down in front of the TV to veg out. Find something else to make you feel good….anything…just figure out what works for you. Of course, if all else fails, that whole God thing could be a back up plan. What do you think?
3. Have the opportunity to date anyone you meet.
Total and complete freedom…that’s what this new life is all about. Anyone you meet is fair game. Sign up for match.com or eHarmony. Create that profile…but you should probably omit that whole “I-just-left-my-wife” thing. That’s not exactly attractive to all those women looking for Mr. Right. I guess you’ll need to do one of two things. One option is to come up with a “story” that explains away that white ring around your finger where your wedding band used to sit. Maybe you could say that your wife died…or she’s the one who left. I’m sure you’ll come up with something. The second option is to date women who don’t care that you just left your wife. You’ll probably find those gals at the club downtown. Look for the really high skirts and the clear high heels.
2. Work as many hours as you’d like.
If you like to work a lot, now is your opportunity! Don’t worry about making it home for dinner on time. Make those extra calls. Take on that project that no one else wants to work on. Suck up to your boss and do whatever he/she wants you to do. On top of that, you can now take clients out for drinks, and you won’t need to worry about getting home before the kids go to bed. With all these extra hours at work, people will notice that you’re an amazing team member. They’ll affirm you for your hard work like your wife and kids never could. Congrats on finally getting the attention and affirmation of the people who matter the most!
1. Enjoy lots and lots of sex.
Finally, the number one reason to leave your wife…sex. Let’s face it. Your sex life hasn’t been that great recently…right? Now you can have sex every single day with that new hot flame you’ve hooked up with…no need to sneak around anymore! It’s new and exciting, and you won’t be able to keep your hands off one another. In fact, you’ll probably be making love multiple times a day…before and after work. You’re finally living every guy’s dream. Of course, it’ll slow down eventually. Sooner or later, you’ll need to develop an actual relationship where you talk more than you grope and develop vulnerable intimacy more than getting naked. Don’t worry about that now though. There’s plenty of time to figure that out later…just like you did in your last marriage, right? If you’re not having an affair already, you’ll now have the chance to hook up with anyone you meet…at least whoever wants to be with a guy who’s just left his wife. I’m sure there are plenty of women out there like that.
There are plenty of “reasons” to leave your wife…whether you’ve had the balls to have an affair yet or not. If these reasons haven’t convinced you quite yet (to avoid the pain we went through) and you’re still contemplating what to do with your life, Laura and I would love to be a resource for you and your wife. Email us for help.
Stew Pid Foole -
Sounds better than living with a hoarding, atheist, non showering, non cleaning, lazy, overweight, ungrateful, disrespectful, lying pig. And yet I stay……..hmmmmm. Thanks God.
frank -
sounds like mine,and the only things that separate, are as follows,the hoarding,{the house is always a mess}the atheist,shes catholic and i am not.
joe -
Dude, I must have hooked up with your wife's sister or something LOL
Stew Pid Foole -
Oh, and no I dont want to have an affair. My marriage is nothing more than a boat anchor dragging me ever further down into her never ending abyss. I was lied to and used as a means to an end. I hate it here.
Bereft of a Life -
Lies usually come from a very hurt weak person who is your enemy. My wife became my enemy the day of the wedding. She changed towards me before we left the church. I stayed. Fool that I am. 15 years later, there is nothing here for me. I've lost my rep, I have no real friends, no romance. She has not ever had any consideration of me in any area of life, whether sexual, personally, psychologically, professionally, or socially. I find myself without joy, a fool. Move on is my advice, don't be as I. Sacrificed for what? I am fool.
Indica -
Same here bro…. and my wifes name is April… so that makes me Aprils fool!! lmao
Guest -
You are Ron Swanson and I claim my $5
Will -
Was this supposed to be sarcastic? Because if it was it was an awful attempt. Leaving my wife was the best decision I ever made. I never in my life been happier. If any man out there are unhappy with their marriage, LEAVE!! Don’t ask for or seek advice just go.
FUBAR -
Will, really?? Man, I would LOVE to talk to you….. Never been happier, eh? Wasnt the conversation terrible? didnt you worry about how she would be without you? sleeping at night? all alone? did you have any kids?
Stuck in the Matrix -
Where was this site hiding all the time. Rightfully put guys always discuss the macho things and how to get "hotties" I always wanted my buddies to share this kinda stuff. Our manhood makes us think that its a failure on our part, but reality tells you to quit at something you're not good at. I would like to know more and would also seek to be a source for advising other men in finding themselves before they try to block the gaps with other distractions. It makes you whole since in fact that's the only time you can really share yourself or any other pleasure. Don't use something to fill voids fill yourself and man up!
river -
i'm in the same boat but everytime i leave i end up coming back and then regreting that i did leaving again and comeing back again its become a never ending story maybe i don't have the ball or the money or i miss my little girl, but thats only while i'm away as soon as i return i realize why i leaft and try to leave again
istaly -
is this supposed to make someone leave or stay i dont get it? cuz the pros and cons seem pretty legit for someone who is even in that position to begin with
Mars -
David got some sense in 10 points however if man decides to leave his wife… there are the reasons behind.
Some of us will feel some emptiness until the social circle accept us back or we accept back socializing.
Most of women is abusers, emotional abusers who are cruel and vendetta is the must because most of them are narcissistic and egoists. They think man is the slave… They abuse man emotionally and never admit to it… they believe that they can do it – because they are women.
For man – leaving woman is not an failure, it is regrouping based on rational decision. For woman it is failure and this is the reason they hate us when we leave them.
BTW – lots of sex and do whatever I want including i can work as much as i want – exactly what i need
Angel -
Sounds like a low life dead beat so called dad & husband. So here is a woman’s version.
10. You don’t have to listen to your husbands constant complaining about everything food, laundry, money, house, yard, work, etc…
9. You don’t answer for every single penny spent…even for toilet paper.
8. You are down one less of a child to take care off.
7. You can go out with your friends and not have to listen to whining about it.
6. You can eat what & when you want.
5. You don’t feel pressed to give oral.
4. You can have sex as much or less as you want.
3. You can have an orgasm in your own time.
2. The toilet seat is always down. Day & night.
1. You can now find a man who appreciates you, loves you & any children that you may have and mostly one that you CAN trust.
@MiamiFanDan -
good luck with that
Mark -
Hmmm…sounds like my list..and I am the husband.
Want to meet up?
Mark -
Hi Angel
Me again (Mark)
I cook all working week nights.
Do all of the ironing and would wash except she doesn't like how I do it.
Sweep floors, vaccum, clean bathroom. All houshold maintenence and renovations etc.
Pick up/drop of to special school events, meetings, sporting events etc.
Use the crap car while she gets the Euro luxury model.
Give her enough money so she doesn't complain.
Give her huge amounts of positive conversation time with none of what I want (need) in return.
Continued….
Mark -
from Mark cont'd..
She calls me sweetie and says she loves me no matter what but abuses me for very minor things and then forces me to apologise if I react negatively.
Makes me feel guilty if I am ill and cannot perform the above.
Thinks that a romantic outing is a day of window shopping – passed up a night of luxury at a hotel, restaurant, spa, massage, show etc for that.
Never pays out on offers of sex – holidays, birthdays, anniversary, in return for favours etc.
Lost weight, got fit, fixed the erectile disfunction, read the lost libido book etc.
Took antidepressants even when my doctor said I wasnt depressed just to appease her. Nobody told me that it would make me impotent.
Had enough now. Won't stop doing the houshold chores or anything else that would make the kids suffer.
Handed over the lost libido book which surprise, surprise she wants to read. That may fix one problem but
too many others not to be resentful so off to counselling I would imagine. Challenge is to get her to come and here is the catch..she is a Psychologist, for God's sake. Poses the question – Doctor, heal thyself!.
Cheers
jbm -
angel are you my wife? cuz honey if that’s the way you feel I will leave. if you don’t consider my son yours I’m out. I’ve been looking for a way out if that’s the way you feel then I’m out. any guys out there got room for a roommate?
SINGLESOON -
iF YOUR HUSBAND HASN'T LEFT YOU ALREADY… HE WILL. uNLESS YOU'RE HIDING SOME MEDICAL MYSTERY… YOU'RE ON THE WRONG WEB PAGE. sOME THINGS ARE SACRED!
Dick -
You suck and this is you Bitch, Women's relationships today follow
a very predictable pattern:
They push men for commitment
They get what they want
They lose interest in sex
They become attracted to someone else
They start cheating
They become angry and resentful
They begin telling their partners that they need time apart
They blame their partners for their behavior…and eventually, after making themselves and everyone around them miserable for an indefinite, but usually, long period of time, they end their relationships or marriages.
chuck -
Im a good man, who just has a bitch fro a wife (bitches about everything 24/7). She doesnt want to go anywhere, she has OCD (cleaning everything). Wont go to a doctor about it, wont go to a marraige councelor about it.. I would have left alongggg time ago, except I AM TOO GOOD of a man to put her out on her own. she has no job, and i dont make enough to support her which is all I do now.
I wish the government who already takes care and supports so many people who can t live on their own, would add seperation and divorce to that list. Because I have no kids with this chick, yet weve been together 15yrs, and I should not have to support her. Id be willing for 1 year, but not more then that.
Tony -
I am in the same situation. My wife has OCD (cleans everything). She is verbally and emotionally abusive. We have been married for 15 years and I am at the end of my rope. I have actually contemplated suicide to end the pain. We went to marriage couseling and it did not help. The counselor told her she needed to see a therapist on her own and she refused. It is like everything that goes wrong is someone else's fault and she is innocent.
Mark -
Hi chuck
I am a good man too and my wife tells me so – to my face and to others but still treats me like a door-mat. She is affectionate but even the slightest complaint or transgression releases that acid tongue. And, sex, she promises much but delivers little. I used to give her the required effection, gifts, long meaningful conversation etc but her response has worn me down so I went elsewhere for sex – brothels only, as I am not the most confident guy socially for picking up women. Met some great women and had some truly great sex and my wife doesn't know butI am so far gone that I do not feel any guilt AND EXTRA-MARITAL SEX DOES NOT FIX THE PROBLEM . So, I am off to conselling to try and, at least, to cope with my own demons and hopefully bring her in to exorcise hers!
right -
You don't have to support that loser. Just leave. You owe her nothing. If she sues you for support go live on the beach. You can't get blood out of a rock. Don't waste your life looking after a sick person who is not willing to get help. You are an enabler. You are helping her to be sick, and dragging yourself down with her. You are wasting your precious life.
True -
Fantastic writing, exactly what every guy who just fed up with a depressing wife needs to hear!!
I long to seek out my goals in life, travel etc.. but when your wife is like a gray rock it really discourages you.
I have kids so they hard part is leaving them and forcing her to work.
But I will die having lived a depressed life if I dont leave. Very encouraging.
Oh and to Mars "Some of us will feel some emptiness until the social circle accept us back or we accept back socializing.
Most of women is abusers, emotional abusers who are cruel and vendetta is the must because most of them are narcissistic and egoists. They think man is the slave… They abuse man emotionally and never admit to it… they believe that they can do it – because they are women.
For man – leaving woman is not an failure, it is regrouping based on rational decision. For woman it is failure and this is the reason they hate us when we leave them. "
That should be in a dictionary its said that well.True,True,True.
david -
i married 2 yrs back.had a son..my main problem is her version of love.her version is if i love her i must submit myself fully to her..but when i ask her back that submission,she said i must accept her without question..its unfair and m really fed up of her version of love.but i am concerning about my son..shall sacrifice my life for my son or shall i leave her cos i got nothing frm her..helpi
Mark -
Hi David
Yeah, I have a wife like that. Don't know if it is a female thing or a feminist thing. But I should have taken more notice of what she said it and I think that it gets down to the old stupid notion lof love that "If you love me you should love every thing about me" or translated in to man-talk I'm not going to change to suit you so you will have to change or just put up with it. And that, my friend, is exactly how it has panned out. So, you know what I am going to do, make her go to counselling with me. If she refuses, then I can say that she refuses to help fix our marriage. But, I am prepared to expose myself and any of my faults as they coome out of a session.
Cheers
hhh -
Mines a hoarder, the house is bursting at the seams with crap. I'm too embarassed about the state of it to have even family around now. When I talked to her about it she said "Love me love my stuff" … I want to burn that fucken stuff
Dissappointed -
Question? What makes you think that you have to leave your kids behind? Why not take them with you and you can struggle to provide for them. Us Moms will meet every visitation demand, call them daily, attend all school functions, be available in the event they are sick, never forget a birthday or holiday, keep them anytime you ask, and bring grocery by every week to ensure that they eat. I think my husband wants to leave, Im 100X's worse off than I was when I met him and his sex SUCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can handle his affairs but Im certain he wouldnt be able to handle mine if I decided to be such the harlot. Dont waste your life on me, I barely noticed you were alive. EXHALING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
david -
yeah.. Now i m decided to leave..dont you know about the law..i cant take my son with me because of the law..lest i ll leavw her long time back..i m well paid and well settled..finding anithr gals nevr been a oroblm to me.i am christian and a good believer.,thats why i dont fuck around..her sex sucks,never gave me any pleasure,.
Dissappointed -
the law where Im from says that if you were married during his birth he's as much yours as he is hers. I hope you are as "Good" as you say you are and dont try and take the kid and never have him see his mom. I have 2 kids that I have raised on my own with little to no help from the father. Now that Im married, if my husband and I were to separate, I would want him to take the child. However, I expect him to give my child everything that he or she deserves. Just providing is not parenting. I would be okay with my child living with his/her father as long as it was a GREAT situation and I could still have that wonderful mother relationship as the co-parent. My children come first and always have, thats another reason why I wanna leave this man. Whenever I start working Im out!!!!!!!
david -
from your experience i understant about your feeling..anyway its a great relief to hear othrs experiance and their advice..i m my fathers only son and my son is their only heir in our bloodline.so my parents try to convnxe me not to leave my wife mainly becos of my son..here xhild custody for minor is almost impossible for father unless the mother give up their ward..thats the problem..but as i mentioned before i will leave her.,i provide her the best that i could..but always complaing and she think i am her slave, never cares about my feeling..anyway for the sake of my company i have to leave her..thnks for your concern
PhilMM -
Some good words of what the future may hold for some.
The issue for me and I suspect many others is that our wives are not the horrible demons that some have. They are still attractive, thoughtful and caring and in general a good friend. In my case, I feel we have develop differently over the 16 years since we met.
One aspect (there are many) She has had a difficult family background as did I but she cannot let it go. Her life is twisted by the issues of the past and I am fed up of the her always going on about it. It consumes our lives now and has got worse. It seems as she grows older she wants to find an answer to how she is feeling.
Another change. She became a born again Suffragette, meaning as an example, all house work is equally shared but garden, money making (She works part time and has done for the last 7 years, although we have no Kids ), DIY, are my responsibility.
In marriage I offered that shoulder to lean on, but not to carry the "weight" of two for the rest of my life
Another. She is obsessed with cleaning and presentation (OCD perhaps), healthy non fat, non junk food. Shit, I cant have a Mickey D's without 30 mins of raggin about how unethical and unhealthy it is.
What i see here is that we have become room-mates, having a laugh now and again, but have bitter arguments over trivial issues such as helping with washing up (hers from the day)…when I am knackered after driving home for 4 hours.
We have not had sex in 2 years and before that it was so formulaic, I was spurned may time. "I want to make love…not have just sex". Jesus where did the spontaneous shag go.
Okay to the point.
In considering starting again, I will miss the good time over the last 16 years, the challenges we got through, the laughs we had and tears we shared.
I am afraid of being alone, and growing old on my own. i am confident and I will meet others I know but there are these doubts in the dark corners of my mind.
However, for all those saying "stay then", be warned… life does get slowly but surely getting more depressing, everyday your shoulders become more rounded, that small independent streak you once held high slowly wilts under the daily monotony of living a life that is not you.
Next…Nervous Breakdown..ahhhhh
The suggestion for state aid should not just be for those left, but those those who seek re assurance to take such a step and get back in living life to the full. Not money but support and a few good get togethers maybe.
May the Force be with you guys…hang in there.. and good luck
Juan -
I think she has been mouthhugin some other dude, read this:
Women's relationships today follow
a very predictable pattern:
They push men for commitment
They get what they want
They lose interest in sex
They become attracted to someone else
They start cheating
They become angry and resentful
They begin telling their partners that they need time apart
They blame their partners for their behavior…and eventually, after making themselves and everyone around them miserable for an indefinite, but usually, long period of time, they end their relationships or marriages.
Unabashed -
Amusing article, just stumbled across it. Appears to be more sarcastic, perhaps even humorous, than to be a true attempt to provide real advice (which seems to be "Hey, if you're thinking of doing this, think hard and then come talk to me about it. You see, I wrote this book and…").
I think there's really only one reason to leave your wife. It's that you just don't love her anymore, or as some may say "not in love" with her anymore. If what you want out of life in a relationship or partnership such as marriage cannot be had with the person you're with, then why bother? One person can't force the other to be someone they're not. You can't make someone love you. You can't fit a square peg in a round hole.
And if you've exhausted all genuine attempts to make it work, to compromise, to meet half way, to be comfortable and content with what IS there, then that's your sign. It's time to throw in the towel, hopefully before something happens to create increased hostility, hurt, sadness (from abuse or cheating or whatever). Not mention, staying for the wrong reasons (the family, the kids, the finances, etc) only prolongs the inevitable; it takes time to heal these situations so the longer you feed the fire the longer it takes to snuff out.
Just my 2 cents here with something I've struggled with for many, many years in my own marriage.
contempl8or -
Unabashed, good comments. You do offer advice that sounds like you're not taking yourself though..
"time to throw the towel in" yet you're still with your wife "struggling"..
appreciate your 2 cents worth, and there are undoubtedly a hell of a lot of guys out there in the same boat, myself included. we endure the pains of marriage relationships and feel locked in this situation because of our kids (or other reasons). Reality is we're not locked in anywhere, it's OUR CHOICE whatever we do. You, like me (and countless others) have chosen to stay married and wear the struggles with broad shoulders, as much as we can take.
There is a point though where we have to ask ourselves "is this struggle WORTH IT?".
So, there it is, balance, contentment, health risks (stress), do the good times outweigh the bad? etc.etc.
Please be aware I'm not offering anyone any advice here, as everyone's situation is different (yet the same). I hear all these comments and empathise emphatically (feel your pain)….
As PhilMM says "hang in there guys". My 2 cents worth.
(ps. just don't let your anger turn to physical abuse – THAT is advice
)
FUBAR -
Hello Unabashed. VERY interesting. Can I ask you…did you leave?
real man -
This article assumes that the wife gets the house and the kids. Real men will fight to keep their kids and their home. Kick the wife out and have her pay child support and alimony. Don't fall into the trap that a man should be the one to leave.
Broken Man -
she is already phiscally and mentally abusive. been in two big fights and both times she has tried to hit me. i have yet to even raise a hand to her. but ill be damned if im going to stand there and let her hit me. and im supposed to just let it go like nothing has happened. tired of fakeing affection to keep her happy so we dont fight. doesnt want counciling she thinks its not worth the money or time. not the same woman i married. just want to be happy again. are we supposed to hit the ones we love??? is that real affection??? So lost in all of this. But some how i feel its my fault for some reason. tryed to be a loving husband and i think im just getting walk on.
fff -
She has a problem and needs professional help. Might not be doing it on purpose just out of control. You seem to have lost perspective, how could it be your fault?
Mark -
Hi Guys
Have posted other comments here about my plight but would like to add that I if you think that you can save your marriage – as I think I can – then it is all about, for want of a better word. Goodwill. But, here is the problem, this is about all of the stuff that we neanderthal males are no good at. Things like asking "How was your day?" or "That looks nice on you" or "would you like to go out for a coffee/picnic/movie" or all that shit that you see in the movies that women ooh and ahhh about which is apparently all true. I am reading this book at the moment called "Where did my libido go" – OK, you are thinking, what is a red-blooded male reading that sissy stuff for but, seriously, I bought it for my wife – risking castration was I – well she demanded I read it myself first, who was I to argue – I wanted to keep my balls.
Mark -
Mark continued……Goodwill hunting!
So, I struggled trough the first 80 pages which I thought was male-bashing to come across all of the stuff that women like to hear and apparently gets them in the mood (if you can wait that long). Can't guarantee that it will stop the nagging or give you more sex but at least when it comes to marriage counselling time you can say, with your hand on your heart, that you did all the right things and she has the problem.
Cheers
Dan -
This list is saddening. Why must men behave in this manner? They make us all look pathetic… They're not really men… You have a responsibility to the family you helped create. And if you can't sit down and talk with your spouse about what both of your problems are, and then work to absolve them, then what is the point?
singlesoon -
Wanna swap Dan? Anyday. You don't have all the answers and you don't know what every guy goes through. Sounds cliche… but its true.
James -
Its more serious than delineated. Its not about the play toys or how men play. Its about emotions and the need for intimacy that men rarely talk about but need. You can put up with a lot if your mate receives and accepts you the way you are. The daily chores, habits, routines are B.S. reasons for cause because if there is true acceptance these things are frivolous and meaningless. Not being able to divulge ones true self results in pent up anger and resentment that swallows up all the petty stuff. Men are more needy than they say and not as callous as the "reasons" depict. Men are not that hard to please but intimacy is essential that, if missing, puts focus on all the wrong stuff.
Stevie -
Well I’m in the same situation as most of you guys. But a tad different.
I got with my wife 4 years ago, she left her ex to be with me, over a year ago we got married, I kinda wanted it but wasn’t 100% about it, but for some. crazy reason I did it anyway.
She has 3 kids from her ex, we don’t have any, the kids are a nightmare to live with. Rude, naughty, disrespectful and I don’t have any connection with them at all to be honest.
Then there’s the money side of things she just spends it all with no cares and recently this has started to mean that bills don’t get paid. It is also starting to affect my job as I have not been able to go to work cos we have ‘no money’ its a joke. People at work have to lend me money to get to work which is pathetic.
Then there’s my love for her.. Its gone, sex is just boring and I hate it when she trys and cuddles up with me. Makes me feel awkard
So there’s my story… I loathe going home after work and I can’t wait to get up the next day and get out there. We’ve always had problems from the start and have always had money and kid problems
Anyway I’m ready to go. I have somewhere to go and I’m going to tell her. I told my family about it all and my mom is saying I should just go.
But I feel so guilty about it that I’m gonna feel bad for a while when I do it, plus she has all her family and friends in the same town as we live so she won’t be on her own…
What do u think guys?
@edjumacator -
run away like you stole it. GETTING WALKED ON TOO. MIGHT WANT TO LEARN TO SPELL
Sean -
This article was massively inappropriately sarcastic. It really just comes off as smug bullshit.
"If these reasons haven’t convinced you quite yet (to avoid the pain we went through) and you’re still contemplating what to do with your life, Laura and I would love to be a resource for you and your wife."
Email them to find out how they've done better in exactly the same circumstances you're in.
Jacob -
My wife actually left me 2 months ago and took my newborn woth her since then she has not let me seen the child and currently i am going through the legal process. I got married at 19 dumbest decision ever but we had been together for 5 years prior and i love her i really do still do in fact and when we got married she turned into a complete bitch! I was struggling so bad with money at one point but she used the fact that she was 2 months pregnant as an excuse to say i cant work in fact she didnt do anything i came home working 8 to 10 hours a day amd the house would be a mess she wouldnt make me anything to eat when i was hungry and everytime i worked late she accused me of cheatin on her! I even told her to call my boss but of course she wouldnt. We had only been together for a year and it all ready ended sp quick but sonce we split up life has been much too great. She left me for an ex that she left him for meaning she started of dating him left him for me then went back to him this girl is 20 and has the mentality of a 5 year old when i got home all i wanted to do was relaxed. But she would get on my ass saying you dont spend enough time with me! I was frustrated. Because i spent what time i did with her and some days she was even ok with that. She wouldnt go to school work clean cook ANYTHING all she did was sit down all day watching tv and not get of her lazy ass im so sick of just going heel to toe for her to make sure shes taking care of and at first i was sad when she left but after two painful months finally seeing the greatness in being single. No more bitching nagging whining complaining about how i spent my money when she wont even work to get her liscense! And she makes it all ways look like shes the innocent one she tells people im a terrible dad and i dont try to see my baby girl when i have profff that i try to see her but she says no! She lied to the police and said i abused her and after a warrant was placed the charges were dropped because she had no evidence just her making shit up but right then and there that was a deal breaker for me! For those considering divorce i would say if youre not happy go with it luckly im only 20 ive got plenty of time to find a good women but only one time of being in my 20s!
she has no job no car no bank account and its sad because shes using my daughter as a scapegoat for people to feel bad for her by saying oh my husband kicked me out when really on august 6th 2012 at 1245 am i read a letter that specifically said im leaving you for someone else man im glad ill let her be someone elses problem but right now ill live stress free it sucks i cant see my baby girl right now but in about 3 weeks ill be granted parenting time so that pain will be over soon fucked up thing is she even said she was going to do what it takes to make sure i never see my baby again! But shes an ignornant lazy piece of trash whose got an iq level of 3 ill let her idodic ways settle her in reality because shes got another thing comming well im happy about how i am now and i cant wait to meet someone much better than her she doesnt deserve a good working loyal man like me if shes going to tell everybody what a douche ive been
JJay -
You MUMs really think you are a cut above the rest dont you, its like you think its your god given right to hold power over your husband/ex-husbandand your childrens relationship with their father. Dad's do too ! I for one am the one who dresses, feeds, wash my 2 children when they wake in the morning, I am the one who picks them up from school or childcare, I am the one who baths them, gives them their dinner/lunch/tea, makes their snacks, reads their stories puts them too bed, then wake through the night to check them or comfort them, I am the one who takes them to the doctors or hospital, I take them out to football, rugby, playzones, parks, on their bikes, buy their cloths, pays for everything they have. Do I want some sort of recognition, NO, I do it because it makes me tick, I love every aspect of my children from their smiling face to changing a wet bed at 3am. I literally take them everywhere with me.
And I do all this, with a self centered, self concerned, over the top, wife that mentally abuses me, spends money like its going out of fashion, and cannot stand to watch our children for longer than 1 minute, has no patience with them and saiz the most dreadful things like "she hates them" or calls them "twats", but if I leave they will be subject to this for at least half of the week.
I just want her to leave, so long as I have my children, I wont need anything else, its just stuff, whats important to me are my kids. I'm pretty sure she will say the stuff is important for her.
ned kelly -
JJay
If you are being Honest, then You Are The Man. Yr kids are the most importent Asset You will Ever have. Start Talking, you have to Communicate.
pa866 -
marriage is a female concept. It is a completely unnatural state for a man to commit himself to a single partner for the rest of his life. We are not programmed like that, we are programmed to have as many partners as possible and women are programmed to select the one partner that will give her what she perceives to be the best genes to generate an offspring. This is why women are so content with marriage and men are ultimately unhappy. Once a woman has her "perfect" partner and has bound him to her for life and generated the requisite number of offspring she no longer needs him so the male spends the rest of his life slowly dying on the inside bereft of what makes him a man, subjugated to the whims of woman who simply no longer needs him. He paces the cage, looking through the bars at the life outside as his life force slowly drains from him. Men, realise this, we have been duped, we have been lied to, we have been lulled into this false sense of security and it needs to end now. Its time for men to take a good long hard look at their partners, their life and their diminishing role in society and honestly ask themselves….have I had enough? and if your answer is yes…then what are you going to do about it? I say its time for men to reclaim their birthright and throw off the shackles of marriage once and for all….stand up and truly be a Man.
neglected man -
women just make it up as they go along. kardashian wannabees.
Dave -
Man I man my girl pregnant and wants me to give my son from a previous relationship back to his mom after I fought so hard no communication except what she wants to say ssoooooo tired just want to sleep for ever
Dave -
Fuck God he is so fucking cruel must be a whore this is fucking hell I get told he leaves or we both go no matter what I lose kids plz some help. Would be appreciated feeling low low low
Hey Dave -
Dave, hope you came to your senses and left her! She doesn't care what you want/need
Depressed -
Hey everyone, my wife wants me to have kids now but I feel I cant take more reaponsibility I want to have fun and travel, she says im selfish for thinking that… shes always sick so I always take care of her and now she wants a baby so I could take care of both of them. I want to leave but I feel guilty cuz we still love each other … btw were married for 2 years and known each others gor 5 and Im an athiest but shes muslim
efjvorijfvf -
Marriage isn't supposed to be a sacrifice! She doesn't care what you want/need
Thearn -
Ive been considering leaving/ separating from my wife for the past 6 months or so. We have been married for 3 years where I have provided everything for her (clean, do laundry, pay bills, etc.) i make all the extra effort (organizing date nights, trying to communiate with her through the day, etc.). When I come home from business trips it looks like a hurricane ransacked our house (proving to me she cant look after herself). I suspect sheis sleeping with other guys, she goes out every single weekend and when she is home through the week she spends most of her time texting people. I love this girl but I dont know how much longer i can stand this. Some insight?
sss -
If she's not sleeping around she might just be having fun and living a carefree life. Selfish but not terminal and when she decides to have kids the partying usually stops
james -
sounds like a lot of what I have thought and at other times not sure where you're going/ Been unhappy for a while and do have someone else that I am seeing. Question is you make it sound so easy, how is that possible?
ben -
Your a tool.
BJM -
Question to all:
Would you stay with a wife who has had an affair and continued to be sneaky (text messages, locking phone) after it without showing any real remorse yet still says she wants to be married despite not rebuilding trust or making changes.
She has OCD, spends money like you wouldn't believe and never really wanted to spend time with me or me and the kids as a family. She is always the victim and is threatening me with kids and finances at the same time she is talking about reconciliation.
I don't trust her and have left home despite having 3 small kids. I'm taking her on with the custody to at least get 5-6 day/nights a fortnight and I'm not rolling over on finances nor being unreasonable. She hates it when I am factual and has twisted stories around to demonise me. She hooked up with a workmate who had a 9 month old baby at the time (great father and husband). She actually had him over at our house to cook dinner for us in front of my kids. She is not even remorseful with respect to the other wife and family, saying she is a bitch because thats what her f.buddy told her.
I didn't know she was having an affair at the time as I would have snotted him. She drinks excessively every night and is obsessed with her looks and buying clothes. She is a flight attendant and thrives on people telling her how attractive she is and how great a person she is – superficially that would appear to be the case.
I have told her that as we get older looks are not that important but constant compliments and validation is necessary like air to her.
She even insinuated I had inappropriately dealt with the kids and have been physically abusive to her, both of which are untrue. In fact she has struck me on a number of occasions. She wants 80/20 of all our money/possessions and only wants to give me the kids when it suits her and refuses to give me her roster so I can plan ahead. She tells me a day or two in advance when I can have the kids.
She stole my gift card her Mother gave me for Christmas and then lied to me that it was lost among other whoppers she regularly tells.
I am going in hard as mediation and "being reasonable and nice" don't work with people like this – they are unaccountable victims and they paint husbands as villains to cover up their own anxiety and shortcomings. I think she has some disease as she is so erratic and has no empathy.
I am not putting up with is and am prepared for a long battle. I will call her bluff with he kid as she really likes her own time and I will not give her 80/20 as she has squandered a lot of our finances and will be coming in to money from her wealthy parents.
Interested in your thoughts as to what you make of the person I have described and my actions. BTW – since separating I have met some great women and know that I have to be with someone who is honest, trustworthy, caring, affectionate and doesn't sweat the small things or obsess over material "things" and their looks. My wife says that Im a terrible guy and she will be so much happier without me, Im not so sure, and if so, why did she ask me to go on a holiday with her on our wedding anniversary. Weird!
Despite uncertainty with kids and finances, I am happiest when not in her presence or control. I hope Karma really does exist as she has got it coming and I want to settle this and move on with someone decent and be the best Dad I can be.
Ryan Adams -
My wife is a miserable person. She is always bitching about everything She is constantly complaIning about her weight and works out all the time but without any visual signs. I really can’t stand that bitch I have three beautiful daughters and i can’t stand the thought of not seeing them everyday. On the other hand i want to slit my wrist when I think about spending the rest of my life with this bitch.
ggg -
Firstly don't slit your wrists. The kids will grow up and move out and you can too. Sounds like she is unhappy and over eating, suggest you find out why?
lewis -
My wife of 15 years.
Lazy. If I stopped doing household cleaning and dishes the house would be fukd. Bottom line.
No sex life.. well. I still have porn and ky. She blames it on her having kids 13 years ago. She is so lazy she doesn’t even want to have sex. But loves to watch lifetime w women having affairs so
on. While eating chocolate.
Fat. 120 when married long hair healthy Now about 180lbs short hair . Looks like a chicken with
eyes. And blows all our money on clothes that
are made to hide fat.
Everything I do gets used against me. I have a few beers. Bam! I’m a alcoholic. I go to the gym. Bam! Who am I trying to impress? I raised my voice during a disagreement. Bam! NowI need anger management. We have tried therapy. Sex therapy. Vacations. Talking. But I’m still the Bad guy.
I’m leaving.. im starting over. For me. Good luck guys.
I do everything. I am expected to do everything cause I’m the man. That includes discipline 3 kids cuase she has no clue. And work to provide them all w I phones internet clothes so on.
Luca -
YOU RE A GENIUS!!!! you just told everything i thought and expressed it in a beautiful article. You are amazing. Thanks for writing this. I would just add a few other reasons(like travelling to destinations of your choice without having to consult and not having to feel angry on how she decides to spend your money, etc) but that's of course up to everyone to add a few personal i"inputs". THANK YOU!!
Jessief -
You are all pathetic complainers.
John -
I was married for seven years. My ex-wife is a vindictive demon. She says I have to respect her parents but she won’t even look at my mother. My parents divorced one week before I was born. So that is why it was so hard for me to leave her. She is always right and I’m always wrong. We shared three children, a dog, a house, and two cars. God I HATE her. She never got anything in the divorce. I got smart and sold all my important thngs (motorcycle, atv, boat and custom car) to my brother for a dollar a piece. She was furious at me when we went to the dividing of finances meeting. I emptied out our accounts and filed custody behind her back. I left her and never looked back. It was one of the greatest days of my life.
John -
When will these women not invade our MAN time. Every so often you see a woman comment and it says were pathetic. This just provides us with even more evidence that most women are feminist that “think” they are independent and smart. What ever happened to loving your husband. Jeez…..
sss -
This was supposed to be a sarcastic article but clearly some guys are so unhappy it would actually better than what they have now!!!